She Bold Crew
Listen as your hosts, hardworking cousins and best friends Rickquetta aka Smillee B, and Eva G bring their authentic thoughts, vulnerability, and humor to even the trickiest subjects in the She Bold Crew Podcast.
Sharing their personal experiences and practical advice on tackling the real-life challenges we all face while exploring interesting conversations around life lessons. Your hosts provide actionable advice and real-world guidance to empower, educate, and inspire listeners.
Shining a light on unsung heroes in the community. This relatable show takes a fun, down-to-earth approach to various subjects ranging from mental health & spirituality to community outreach. Listen to elevate your morning coffee, past time on your lunch break or evening commute!
Truly a podcast everyone can enjoy
She Bold Crew
The Strength of Relationships Behind Bars w/ Montreanna & Manny Culbreath
Our rollercoaster of emotions doesn't stop there—Manny and his wife step into the spotlight to share their remarkable journey. From high school sweethearts to a partnership tested by iron bars, they reveal the essence of reconnection and the power of choice in love. Their candid discussion peels back the layers of their bond, inviting you into the raw reality of incarceration's impact on family, the significance of shared values, and how judgement can either bind or break the threads of our relationships.
We're not just talking about love; we're stepping into the arena of criminal justice, exploring how faith guides us through life's trials and the significance of community uplift. As we commend the entrepreneurial strides of Montreanna and others, we're reminded that the most profound connections are those forged through shared experiences and the encouragement of a compassionate collective. This episode is a heartfelt embrace to all who find strength in love's resilience and to those who support them—one story, one victory, one chapter at a time.
Hey SBC supporters! Want to connect with us ? You can send us a text message.
She bold, she real, and she's definitely ready. Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of the she Bold Crew Podcast. It's your girl, smiley B and Eva G, and we are here with a special guest today.
Speaker 2:And we are back with another episode.
Speaker 1:There we go. Listen, you ain't got to correct me.
Speaker 2:I'm excited about the guest. I'm excited about the guest I done skipped the intro.
Speaker 1:I'm ready to get to the guest. No, but for real y'all. We have a guest today and I'm super excited to speak with her. We have Ms Matriana. Matriana, do you want to introduce yourself? Just kind of let us know where you're from, just some like you know. Quick little get to know you.
Speaker 3:Of course, hi y'all. I'm Matriana. I'm originally from Chicago, but I'm branched off to the country. Um I live in isla now. Um, I'm a content creator and a prison wife okay, yes, guys.
Speaker 1:So if y'all want to know, you know how we came across miss matriana and I reached out to her. Um, I came across a video that I seen her in on a YouTube channel Titled love, don't judge, and from my perspective it was like a whole bunch of Couples giving their stories like Some would consider like Non or unconventional Relationships type situation. But I really found her story interesting and I thought it would be, you know, great to Reach out and, by the grace of God, she was willing to. But I really found her story interesting and I thought it would be great to reach out and by the grace of God, she was willing to speak with us today.
Speaker 1:So we're super excited to get to know her some more. But before we do that, you know, you guys, we like to do our WTH moment. So you got a WTH moment.
Speaker 2:My WTH moment and anybody that is living in Columbus Ohio. I think we all have the same wth moment. Why the hell is there this young lady going viral right now? She has been, she's been going viral on the internet. She's been on radio stations. She is going viral for being on live while she was dropping her children off to children's services because she said willingly they didn't come and take her kids. She came to drop her children off, recorded the whole thing on live and said you know, she just overwhelmed, she didn't want them, she couldn't do it. My question is why the hell would you record that on live?
Speaker 1:yeah, no for sure. And, um, this is a good one, being that, you know, it's mother's day weekend and when I seen the video because I watched the videos in like backwards order and I didn't know I just seen somebody share it because, like you said, it was going viral, so I clicked on it and I'm watching it and I'm literally like in tears watching this video because I'm like I'm you know, I'm a single mom.
Speaker 1:I can relate like to being overwhelmed, and this and that but then kicks in my sense of discernment when I'm like something told me, like let me go to her page, let me get a little bit more insight about this young lady because initially, as a mother, somebody who loves helping people, who loves reaching out, my, my urge was to initially reach out and I think I want to reach out you know.
Speaker 1:But then I did some more digging and I'm like something ain't right about this story and, lo and behold, you know, everybody is in the up for on social media about it right now. Like, like you said, she was just on a radio station. Um, of course, I'm sure a lot of people are reaching out to her to do interviews and this, this and that. But I'm looking at the bigger picture, like I need to understand the whole scope before I start judging. Or you know, trying to reach out or trying to do this or do that, and, lo and behold, we ran into the other side. The other side, the baby daddy and the baby daddy's family and let's just say it's.
Speaker 2:It's two sides to a story and they want to come on to the podcast and get a spill, so stay tuned you know, we got something for y'all and anybody who's who knows that you know and listen to our podcast.
Speaker 1:We don't do like none of our topics we don't. We don't typically get into like messy stuff, like we we're.
Speaker 1:Our overall goal is to empower, educate build uplift, be a support of our listeners and all of that, but at the end of the day, I think it's a bigger picture to it. I feel like anything people post on social media, whether sad, happy, whatever people take it and run with it and they don't really know the facts. And it's not always our business to know the facts. But when you're talking about a woman on facebook crying, dropping her kids off the cps by saying she's overwhelmed, but then you see a video or a post where you talking about you, about to be outside, shaking your, your, your ass and no she didn't.
Speaker 1:And it's people donating money, people over here crying me over here, sad. You know what I'm saying and you know and, like I said, I don't know the you know her scope, like what her mental health status is or none of that. So I'm not passing judgment, I'm just more so want to pray for the young lady. But I think that it is always important to understand the full story, exactly because we will be hearing it's not.
Speaker 3:Yeah that's it. I think that play a part in like intention, kind of like you were saying that it sets the tone. Because I feel like you, you got to think about it. Every time we go on social media it's an influence with anything, so you don't know what somebody else is looking at them. They like, oh she can get all this per se clout off doing this, let me do it, you know. And now they just take certain steps and do certain things. That ain't we don't really want everybody to do this. Just, you know if somebody could have actually needed the support and the help that they need, that and now you done burnt us. So now we look at the next person somebody posted. I ain't gonna necessarily be so quick to help them, because the last one, right he wasn't really genuine, so right, and then it's like, yeah, because it's like, I understand.
Speaker 1:But that's just so scary that the world we live in right now, in the times that we live in that people feel like they have to go that far, like you're going to give up your kids whether you really gave them up or not like and record it to get help. Really, you know it's people out here that do need help, but you don't. The fact that you feel like you have to go that far to get help, and the thing about it is people want everything so instant. If you're working hard and it's meant for you, it's going to be for you. You have to be patient. You know what I'm saying. You have to trust the process, but me, as a, I just could not never see myself doing.
Speaker 1:I mean I done been overwhelmed, don't get me wrong. I have been overwhelmed, like a lot, and I feel like any mother is, whether they are a single mother or not. Being a parent is one of the scariest, most stressful jobs in the world. You're responsible for another human body. Like what do you mean? Like that's just. You know it in a nutshell.
Speaker 2:But it's overwhelming for women, period Married mothers and two parent household mothers. I mean it's an overwhelming job but all of the stress that I've ever had with you know, or the hard times that I've had with being a parent, that has never crossed my mind to just go drop them off at children you know that has never crossed my mind, you know for sure I might have wanted to drop them off at my mama house or somebody, but not that right.
Speaker 3:When we do that, I think, um, my whole thing with dropping them off to somewhere like that, it would just be. You know, people that grow up in foster homes don't tend to have like really good experiences sometimes. I know what I I would be just like. This would be the absolute last resort.
Speaker 1:Yes, like, like y'all would have to come pry my kids out of my hand, like I will almost have to be physically not able to take care of my kids like physically, like wheelchair bound, can't walk, can't see, like that is what it would take like for me to like hand over my kids.
Speaker 1:I'm not like going, like I'm just not, because those were, they were blessings to me. There's women out here that can't bear children, that want you know that's what they live for. They, they want to have a baby. You know what I'm saying. And they can't have that and I'm not going to take for granted the blessing that the Lord gave me because I'm overwhelmed because I chose to have these kids.
Speaker 1:You know what I'm saying? Like no, um, so yeah, that's, that's a deep one right there, y'all. So keep tuned in. You know, we, we, we might have something in the works coming with this other side, but not on no messy or, you know, judgmental or trying to bash nobody. It's really just trying to hear both sides and really understand, because this is serious. You know what I'm saying. You're you're talking about somebody's character. You're talking about somebody's parenting you're talking about you're on here saying some crazy allegations and I feel like everybody should have a platform and I feel like, as women, it is a gift and a curse that we are, um, you know, babied in a sense, yeah, like we're, like I feel like everybody jumped to her aid because she's a woman and everybody's like, oh, she's a woman.
Speaker 1:We're looked at as more delicate and helpless. But that's why these men act like they do too, because they feel like I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't. It's I can't win for nothing, whether I tell my story, whether I don't, because I'm the man and I'm always got to be looked at wrong in a situation, and it's like no I love that women can be handled delicately and people can flock to them and support them.
Speaker 1:But I think that it's. It's scary that somebody can get on there and say, oh, this, this and that about another individual or you know a man, and people just like, oh yeah, F him, he ain't nothing, we're going to help you.
Speaker 2:And it's like, and there's just so much that you have to post the things on social media Like you have to be so good. This is going to follow her for the rest of her life, her child's father for the rest of her life, her child's father for the rest of her life, her kids for the rest of their life.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh, yeah, that's deep. Yeah, I just would never. I would try. My heart is to never put my kids. I would try not to put my kids in that situation period, but I damn sure would never post it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, on social media that is, that's very public. Like you said, you can never delete that. You don't even people probably screen recorded that. This is what I'm hearing about. I haven't heard about it here but, like you said, it's plenty of women that there's a lady out here she just went to jail for they say she kidnapped her son but she gets visitation hours with him and she's a dang good mom. They even like here um, for the simple fact like I don't like to get my kids um, what is it?
Speaker 3:Vaccines I try to like it is as many as I can't like that. I try to stray away from the ones that are not required, but the one prior I have to get them. They came to a point where they were like you can get your kids taken for not getting them to require vaccines. Um, this is, it's illegal to not get them vaccinated and they actually took a child away from the mother for not getting their kids vaccinated. They said that was neglect. So it's people that actually want their kids and they don't have the opportunity to have them in for someone to just take and those are the people whose story we will want to, you know, hear.
Speaker 2:Those are the people whose story we will want to, you know, hear. Those are the people that would actually get the help and the resources. I mean because this young woman who you know in columbus that posted this I mean people are, you know, cash shopping or all type of money she's getting paid for um interviews and, uh, just all kinds of you know, like I said, she was on the radio and so she's getting a lot of resources and a lot of help and there are so many people that are really, really trying and could really use that no, for sure my husband called y'all okay.
Speaker 1:So, guys, as I stated, um Montriana, I came across her and her profile and her story with her, her journey with her husband, who is currently incarcerated, um on a YouTube channel and um, I thought it was very interesting because, you know, a lot of people had a lot to say about, like her decision to marry her husband while he is in prison and serving what is a life sentence. You know, and you know, I feel like it's just really important to understand people and where they're coming from. I feel like, like we said before, everybody's so quick to pass judgment. There was so many comments, you know, and I just was, I just was like wait, like y'all don't know this young girl, y'all don't really know and even in the video.
Speaker 1:It was like an eight minute video, um, you know it wasn't long at all, so it's like you can't really learn nothing from an eight minute video. For you.
Speaker 2:The great thing about our um episode that y'all won't get from that video is we actually have her husband, manny. He's going to be calling in and he's going to be joining, so we will hear his perspective as well.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, yeah, so, and that we didn't have that plan we just thought we was gonna be chatting with miss but she's uh, you know, speaking with him right now. He's calling in on her other phone, so she's just kind of giving him the rundown, and of course I'm sure he wasn't expecting it either, but she said she seemed that he seems like he'll be pretty open to it.
Speaker 2:So yes, awesome that'd be really dope his perspective. Yeah, I love hearing male perspectives about everything anyways, no, for sure, for sure I think, it's important.
Speaker 1:Like I said, the world is not made of just all women for a reason there's men and women and I feel like yeah, my bad y'all Okay.
Speaker 3:so he talked about. He said he's definitely interested if y'all had any questions for him or just wanted him to. Definitely yes, let's see if you can hear him, though. Hello.
Speaker 4:We can hear clearly Hi Mannyny, how are you doing?
Speaker 1:I'm doing all right. That's good.
Speaker 4:I'm smiley and I'm even oh, I got joy if I want me to talk to y'all tomorrow. Happy mother's day oh, thank you we appreciate that, yes, so much.
Speaker 1:Well, we, we're excited that you're, um, you know, open to speaking with us today. We didn't we didn't expect it, we didn't plan for it, so we're super excited and we appreciate you taking the time. I know you want to speak to wifey um, but yeah, we, we appreciate both of you guys coming on and um just chatting with us. Like I was explaining to the listeners, we reached out to um, your wife, because I seen your guys's story on the YouTube channel the Love Don't Judge YouTube channel and I thought it was so interesting and I just, like you know, I feel like people don't really try to take the time to really understand people for who they are.
Speaker 1:They just look at a situation and they just start judging and giving their opinions and you know's. All fine, everybody has an opinion, it's you know. But I think it's important to learn the substance of situations and and get to know people in their situation so that you can learn to understand. That's what life's about. If we don't learn to understand different things, that that may not be normal to us, then like, what is, what are you doing?
Speaker 2:you know, right, and I mean I so many questions and I don't know if I want to direct them to. I don't know which one of y'all want to answer, but it's just. You know, how did y'all meet? How did this start? How did the proposal go Like? Tell us.
Speaker 3:We got two different stories about how we met.
Speaker 4:We made up a whole little scenario about walking me home like that's a whole life you could start explaining how you feel like we and like no, for real, for my cousin.
Speaker 4:Like she said my cousin had introduced us, but I don't, I don't know if she did or not. All I can remember is me just seeing her. When I see, I just tease hard as hell, like like I know me, like people first, or something that I don't shy from and I don't run from that. But it's like when I'm saying hi, like I had a thing, like damn, who, like I can't speak, I can't talk tight. Did you feel me? So oh, like I don't know, but like, eventually, eventually, my cousin, she said she did introduce us. Oh, this is my cousin, this is my cousin, this is my cousin, this is, was it so?
Speaker 3:I mean, when we were in high school, and then from there on out she took it. From there, yeah, my birth. He came, he inboxed me and then his cousin said something to me about him because I was ignoring him, because it was I had just moved to this city. So it wasn't really, you know many people I knew, but I knew her because we went to school together and I saw her. I never really saw him because he wasn't in class, you know. You know you weren't doing the class thing, right, you should have been in class, right. She ended up introducing me to him after, like I guess he was asking her about me. He never walked me home from school.
Speaker 2:He never made sure I got there. He didn't never walk me home from school, but he never made sure I got there safely. He never got me home. That is so cute okay yes, for sure.
Speaker 1:Like I think that's so cute, the fact that he's like oh no, I could not stop cheesing like uh-huh, I see everything. I'm like, yeah, she's pretty. Like I want to talk to her when I like her vibe, like I want to get to you know, know her and like you know their story. I think that is very interesting and I feel like, even though for some people it may be common, for some people it's not, but, like I said, you know, of course, to each his own, but, like I said, it's still important to try to get to understand and know people you know.
Speaker 1:So one of the things that a lot of people say is like you know, y'all met and started dating um in high school um and then um was it? Y'all broke up and went separate ways and then got back together later. Um so, with that, you know, with your husband being incarcerated, they, you know I've seen like people saying, like you know that's selfish of him to want to marry you or to, you know, lock you down in a sense of like being, you know, faithful and having that, that, that commitment, while he's locked up.
Speaker 1:But I'm and my aspect I'm like just because somebody is incarcerated doesn't mean that they don't deserve love. You know what I'm saying, if that was there. If they have genuine, real love, like who's to say that because of the circumstances, that he doesn't deserve that?
Speaker 3:right, all right, I understand that. So with other what he he's gonna call that but, um, with other people they may feel like like you other he's going to call back, but with other people they may feel like, like you said that he's selfish, but I truthfully don't feel like he got a choice. You can't make me stop talking to you Period Because, like he could leave you for two. So like that's like saying, okay, I want you to have a broken heart because I feel like you don't need to be with him. So you're telling me he's selfish because he's allowing me to date him, but that's who he loves. Like he, he wanted to date me just as much as I want to date him, regardless of where he's at. If he's making me happy and he's fulfilling these needs besides physical, then what's the problem with that? I don't feel like that's selfish. He's not holding me back from anything. Like I go where I want to go, I do what I want to do. I just don't do stuff like other people. I don't mess around with people. That's the same as people on the outside. Like they could say that, with you dating a man for six years, are you saying that he's holding you back and he's selfish because he's dating you.
Speaker 3:The only difference is he's incarcerated. So is he's incarcerated. So most people are like, yeah, you don't have. You don't have the opportunity to explore other people. But when you're in a relationship with a man on the outside, you don't have the opportunity to explore other people. So how is it? How is it any different? It's just I'm in a relationship with someone I'm choosing to love, just like he's choosing to love me. We it's. It's not to say I'm not oblivious to reality. It could very much well not work out, which is something that we've had a discussion about. We don't feel like it won't work out, but we know it could possibly not. But right now he's fulfilling those needs. Right now he's making me happy. So why would I leave somebody based off a risk of wasting time, when everybody faces that risk in a relationship every day?
Speaker 1:you know what I'm saying exactly exactly, and I think that what you said was so important. Like you said, we choose to love. You know that. That's always. You know, everybody has that choice and it's for someone to judge you for who you choose to love. That that's it's really, you know, insane to me because, like you said, at the end of the day, the only thing that's missing is the physical, and that seems to be the thing that everybody always focuses on, and that's what's the shock value. There is like he's not physically there with you and even though ideally we made that, you know in our heads that that's what a picture perfect relationship looks like, like we live together, we're home with each other every night, and this is the night and this is the night, but, like you said, there's relationships out here, on the outside, that don't look like that you know, there's relationships out here, where their husband's in the service and he only can come home every three months for three days or whatever or relationships.
Speaker 2:People don't judge that relationships where you know one of the people might be disabled and there might be a lack, of you know physical there we see that a lot and people are in relationships and they're single mothers.
Speaker 3:I've seen that that's more frequent. You have single parents in a household with a man that don't do nothing, don't help, don't like. So it's like come on, I have a, a man that he calls his daughter every day. He helps with my kids, whether it's my son or my oldest son's autistic. He talks to the therapist every Wednesday with me. We recap with them.
Speaker 3:He helped me, um, build a plan for my son on a schedule, because I have a hard time maintaining schedules and staying focused. He created a focal point and plan for me to live by. So it was like he balances them, points the parts of me. So it's like if he's fulfilling that and he's doing his job from there, he get extra points to me because it's been here and they say, like you know, he got more than enough time he should be, he better be doing this. And it's like it's men that are in there that aren't doing these same things and it's also men that choose to do the wrong thing. It's also men that choose to do other things while they're incarcerated. So the fact that he's choosing to do the right thing and help and fulfill my needs in his free time. That?
Speaker 2:that shows me a lot no, for sure I love that his dad's out here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's not doing that much, it's like he he really making up for that for the physical, because that's what.
Speaker 1:Those are the things that are important to mothers. Yeah, and and you know people, I heard that's raising kids and guardians like it. You need that backup support, like you. Like we said earlier with the wth moment no, where is there a rule book or a guide to being a parent? But when you always have, when you're able to have that other perspective or that other point of view, be able to be like, look, babe, maybe if you try it this way and be able to call you out on certain things or help you see things from, yeah, like that is very valuable, like what and, like you said, it's important to mothers and just people.
Speaker 3:Period, like when we hear those things, like that's what's important to me. I'm not worried about a physical man, I'm not worried about a physical man or just having someone there more than I'm worried about somebody taking care of business and things that I need to take care.
Speaker 2:Yeah, one of the hardest things for me personally being a mom is having all of these to-do lists in my head and all of these millions of thoughts and things. So to hear that he can help you organize those thoughts and like focus and prioritize and create schedules, because schedules that's one of the biggest things about you know, parenting. Getting on a schedule, I mean even helping to take some of that off like that is a big weight, yeah no for sure I agree for sure, but for the most part they would do.
Speaker 3:What do you feel about people saying that you selfish for um allowing me to be with you?
Speaker 4:man everybody gonna have their own opinion, definitely from like me and all the situations me being locked up for the moment, for the time right now. She's young, she got a lot of life ahead of her. Let her live her life. He's selfish Y'all got a third but for real, for like that, don't like be on my end. Like I give her that boost and that confidence and that push like hey, boost, boost. Like you is a face that people need to see on TV and I be trying to give her that push and I told her before like I want you to move and I want you to like expand, like expand like your brand, like you doing a lot you stand for like the rock you're going, like it's a successful out and like there's not too much going on in that report.
Speaker 3:So I want her to like go to, like the big cities and stuff like that, but like so I should turn around on me what I feel like he's saying is that, like he's not holding me back for anything, because he's encouraging me, if anything, to do more and to expand more. And if I'm having doubts about not going so far because I don't want to be too far away from him, he's like, okay, let's do this, and he also puts in that effort, he'll transfer, he'll do this or offer other suggestions, just things to fulfill and fill in that distance. It's just things that we're not figuring out at that moment. Basically, he's pushing me to move forward if anything. As far as selfish. Do you feel like it's selfish that we're together?
Speaker 4:Hell, Paul, I ain't so loose.
Speaker 1:I know that's right. No, for sure yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because y'all's story is giving love at first sight.
Speaker 1:No, it is. It's very admirable.
Speaker 4:Oh, yeah, yeah, like. And then when we young, we don't even know what love at first sight was, mm-hmm, that old saying. When you know, you know Mm-hmm, old times. I'm being new, but the young, young, dumb, naive me. I just let people get in my head and feel my head away bullshit, nonsense and let them tell me about my woman. The whole time I said listen to my woman, it's a lie, I'll tell you so he's talking about is why we broke up the whole time I've been through why we broke up.
Speaker 3:Okay, yeah, whole time off being, though why we break up I had. I was talking to a girl while me and him were in a relationship. He told me that he knew I liked women, but I was talking to a girl while me and him was together and he knew about it. I told him or everything, but it's people. Other people started to find out what he was allowing. They was getting in his head like you shouldn't be letting her do this and that's not right and just making him feel bad about that.
Speaker 4:So that that broke us up and to this day we have the same talk, but like me like going, developing and definitely coming into, like the society I'm in now, being around all these other grown men growing up around all these other grown men like my mental, like it elevated and developed. Then I always used to care about what people think, how people view me and all that. Now it's like I don't care about that no more, like I'm living my life now. I used to live with other usually other people last and now I'm doing all right. This is so. It taught me a lot. You like your loss or that the menu now can't hear me about men. You can't hear me about watching us, only watch you on the TV. But watch on. That's how you.
Speaker 3:I feel like that's big reason why we don't like. Like when people opinions, I don't take them into consideration because I think it's a cycle, like you know how sometimes when you make a mistake the first time, you kind of learn the second time not to let that same mistake do things. So it's kind of like we've learned that outside people are going to have a lot of. They don't make good points too, but it's not a point proven to me, because your good point about you saying like you can't get to live your life, to you that's a good point, but to me I'm doing the same thing, you know. So it's not proven. You know, correct, nobody gets to say something that's convinced me that I'm doing the wrong thing, because if I'm happy every day and I'm waking up and I'm satisfied, I don't get the problem.
Speaker 1:Correct To come and tell somebody how they're living their life is wrong or it doesn't. Just because it doesn't, it's not something that you would do or it doesn't fit what your ordinary lifestyle looks like or whatever. At the end of the day, instead of trying to understand like okay, you know, for me it's just like it. Just, it made me inspired in a sense of like wow, there is true love out there that really does exist, genuine love. Where is true love out there, that that really does exist, genuine love, where someone who doesn't have that physical access to another person and regardless of what you know, the circumstances may look like in this moment, they still willing to love that person unconditionally and show that loyalty and that you know, faithfulness to that person and be like look I'm, I don't care what nobody say, like that's a beautiful thing in itself.
Speaker 1:So for people to want to just hit on all the surface level stuff that doesn't like that doesn't really matter If this person is happy and they're genuinely loving this person, like you said, because they choose to, not because they feel forced or obligated. Because I know you said that you have children and he has a child as well. So, and some you? You said that you have children and he has a child as well. So in some, you know, in some people's eyes, it's like there's nothing tying you to each other, and that's where the beauty lies. Like there's no nothing. That is like, oh, I'm obligated to this person. I choose to, without of my own will, to love this person and you know, do this thing called life with this person.
Speaker 3:We're going to figure it out every day and that's just what it is right, some people have opinions too, and they, they, they want to um, convince us to do things the way they they would.
Speaker 3:But if I lived for y'all, let's say I'll leave my husband alone, not stop messing with him just because you say to do it. But at the end of the day you gonna still go back and lay with your life. You still gonna go and live your life how you want to. And I gotta wake up with a broken heart because I listen to you you're not fulfilling what, what he was fulfilling. You don't make me happy like he was. So it's like I'm not. Why would I listen to somebody that if you have no part of my life, you don't know what's going on or how I'm living it, exactlyfully, exactly. That's another thing we talk about all day, every day, because you know a lot of people like they, like us, they love us and then like a lot of more people like they don't want to see us grow and be successful together and be together, type shit like that.
Speaker 4:So and then another thing we talk about all the time like all the native things that people do say. It's like we just take that and turn that like don't let it get to us. Like sometimes, like some of the things that they say I know she was trying to roll it off her shoulder but I know like like you can't help it Like some of the things that people do say it gets to you. But at the same time we got to turn this to motivation and just who they ass want.
Speaker 3:Yes, I just don't like when people lie. If people say like she out there, fucking, I know she is, you don't know me, that be blowing me. I'm so irritated that be what they gonna do. Yeah, you project it. Say it as an opinion, not as a fact. When you say it as a fact, I just want to go off. No, don't project it like say it as an opinion, not as a fact. Because when you say the fact, I just wanted like go. Oh.
Speaker 1:No, don't say I'm lying on me, you lying, yeah, you don't even know me.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I know he messed with somebody in that. What the whole on let's, let's.
Speaker 1:And that's just that judgment, and that's just like you know what I'm saying. It's so sick because, like you said, that's just stereotype in the situation. Oh, everybody that's in jail for a long time is messing with people in jail. Or if your man in jail, that for you know, years on top of years, you out here sleeping with somebody, everybody's not sex crave everybody ain't got everybody's not. Yeah, like people got control over theyself, but some people don't.
Speaker 1:Them be the people that don't they be the ones that don't have the control, and that's how it always is, those judgemental people that's pointing fingers and saying all this stuff. They're really just trying to mask their own insecurities and their own issues. Cause it be girls out here, baby daddy, go to jail for 15 days. They don't sleep with Tom, dick and Harry, and you know what I'm saying. And if that's your choice, that's your choice, baby, but don't put that on me.
Speaker 2:Right, yes, we've been wanting to do that. And since we talked about the time aspect of it, are y'all able to kind of explain, like I don't know if you can talk about the charges, or can you talk about like how long will you be away? Do you know when you guys will be able to what?
Speaker 3:does that look like? So we the whole situation. We can't talk about the situation that would have initially, but we can talk about the charges. So, right now, what was it Conspiracy to? It was conspiracy, it was robbery and was conspiracy, it was robbery and then there was murder, but it's a felony murder charge. So it's basically like Someone had died in commission of a crime, while like a crime was being committed.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay, yeah, I've heard of that, and so how?
Speaker 2:How much time did they give you?
Speaker 4:They gave me, they gave me a life sentence. Okay, like, like they gave me a life sentence, but like everybody like and the commission of crime like, if you is like like this is a felony and the commission of crime or somebody, the commission of felony, somebody's bad, then it turns over to a felony murder. So when you and it turns over to a felony murder, so when you and like you got co-defendants, which I had co-defendants, and I went to trial with one of my co-defendants or whatever, a joint criminal trial, so if your co-defendant gets sentenced for one thing, then you automatically have to get, by the time that 10 got to get sentenced, the same thing that they get sentenced. Seeing all how, like they dug into my end, dug into all the evidence that pertained to me, that pointed to me, what they so thought, they knocked charges down from me and gave me a lesser charge than what they gave a couple other people. That was on my case.
Speaker 4:Why? Because they were saying that there was really no participation. They were like there's no participation on my end, they just do something. Participation on my end. They just threw something at me because of my past People could change and shit like that. So they just threw charges at me due to my past, whatever.
Speaker 3:I think the main thing with his case is everybody on his case has first degree robbery. He's the only one with second degree because he's planning to be there doing like a rivalry um also in normally if, like we said, with felony murder that's an automatic life sentence, would you they charge you with with murder for that? They didn't charge everybody with that. So what I feel like is important is they know he didn't unalive this person. The mother um wrote a letter on his behalf and she essentially defended him. He said he was a part of the co-defendants trial as well. So it looked it looks really bad. Well, looked it really bad until we go back to court in oct.
Speaker 3:Okay, so we're looking for, we'll be ready for that, right In the name of Jesus. Just to show all the things that should have been taken into account before. It's a lot of stuff on that case that points and shows with evidence that he didn't unalive this person. So if everybody don't have a life sentence and we see he didn't unalive this person, does that mean that y'all are letting out person that actually did kill the person in there that didn't? How is that fair, how is that justice and how is that? That's what the main thing is with that. So, without saying too much yeah, it's done. Yep, we understand with my suit. If you don't understand, I was there too, then I know that's right.
Speaker 1:No, really, because, like you said, it just becomes a matter of like y'all really find this person's life that invaluable that y'all would just hit him with a life sentence. Because what? Because he's a black man in america today, like, at the end of the day, I feel like sometimes it's just to try to uh make it seem like they're giving justice to the family. So it's like if we, we gotta charge somebody with this so that we can look like we're giving people justice and the people out here like that's not justice, that's not rightful justice. That's just you trying to do like you know what I'm saying. You trying to make like no, I ultimately the end I career, feel like in this situation there's no justice. Really, be a sir today, I what they override a princess of day.
Speaker 4:They override a system so it's easy for them to hand down a license.
Speaker 3:But it's hella, hella, harsh, dress for over when to get that license up off you when you know you can't do it even with evidence, like it's, even with the the jury, babe, she, one of the jurors, was related to the family, so well, like, so it's exactly. How did y'all let that slip through? And they said my husband said the judge was laughing and joking with the family, but this was out now. Granted, she was smart so she ain't do it during the case, but after, obviously, you know they want to give them their. Yeah, during a recess. I didn't even know that, see, but it's um, what is?
Speaker 3:it did y'all ever seen that one um black judge that hugged that um police officer?
Speaker 2:I was just talking to somebody about that the other day. It was a female police officer that I think she uh one man's home. Well, I don't know if she broke into his home or what, but he was in his own home and she went to his home and you know, shot him and he passed away, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he died and she and it was a black female judge and she came down and hugged the police officer that was crying, you know, during the trial and everything and, yeah, that that was looked at as like it was frowned upon.
Speaker 3:Because, like, people look at the judge like, although you may feel with this, but you it really makes you look at it like the judge that was handling manny's case, for instance. He could have had something like this happen to his family member before, so he in a sense getting justice for them too through his ruling. Like you never know what somebody is going through, you could have been having a. I've seen somebody on tiktok. A judge posted on tiktok. He said, realizing on my lunch break that I didn't have to get him in three years in jail, I just was hangry oh wow and think that's funny.
Speaker 3:Like that's funny and very bold with stuff like that, because it's like it's hard to undo shit like that. It is it is.
Speaker 4:That's what I was just. I was just talking to my celly about that just like a couple nights ago. It's like like us being black, like we really too much don't have no black judges, really Like I'm talking about white judges and the things that people go through they can't understand, they can't compromise, get off of what a black child went through, been through and all types of shit like that, but a black judge can. So a black judge can show like some type of compassion or anything. Any such case versus a white juror who did like automatically they're going to be the harshest time ever.
Speaker 3:But even sometimes compared, like all having emotions, like as a human being, in that type of position is kind of is sometimes the problem, because it's like like I was saying, if they're relating too closely with the case, that can, that can make their decision. You got to realize, at the end of the day, with jurors, with judges, these are human people who have life outside of this position. So you never know who irritated them. You never know if they're tired, exhausted, really just trying to get it over with, just trying to go it. You have jurors where they'll just go. What the next juror is saying, just like I don't want to keep prolonging this case, like they when you came to a conclusion in three days, okay, I agree, let's all just go to get on the same page, but that one juror could have could have changed the whole case if they didn't agree with everything everybody else is saying. So this is a few other humans who have regular day lives is responsible for another person's life.
Speaker 1:They have a little troll over how somebody else's life how? Somebody's been the rest of their life, and that's insane. And let me ask you guys, um, how old are y'all?
Speaker 3:I'm 24. Okay 27.
Speaker 1:Okay, and how long have you been in prison?
Speaker 4:I've been here going on seven years. I told her seven years, wow, how long have you been in prison? I've been in here going on seven years, october 11th is going to be seven years, wow.
Speaker 4:So for seven years you've been trying to prove your innocence and like, fight this, like appeal this Appeal, yeah Right, wow, like seven years Like it get overwhelming and stressful, like you feel like you would lose yourself just trying to fight so hard Cause it's like you know. You like what did I go wrong with? What did I do? I didn't do nothing to deserve all this time. I deserve time like this period, and this is my first time coming to the prison and I'll come to prison and this is the time that you get you know. But for seven years you fight and fight and fight. She gets stressed on over when it's a point you want to give up.
Speaker 3:But BPMB ain't no more fucking giving up, right try to use that against him like when, um, they you don't have to go deep into this part, but about like with him losing his sister. They try to use that against like with him losing his sister. They tried to use that against like him as a person, like they feel like he's. He's not necessarily like a danger to society, but like moving emotionally, you know. So they feel like he, he needed to be away from society, in a sense remaining. Do you know what I'm talking about, babe?
Speaker 4:when they had brought that up in the case yeah, yeah, they brought up the fact that since my sister passed away, oh well, I drifted off left or I went about things in a wrong way, in a wrong manner, in a way shape, fashion or form, but totally like I did that, Like they painted a picture for me, they talked for me, they viewed me to the jury in a way that they wanted to view me. That's what that's about. You can't get up and talk with you how you want to on trial. You can't just stop and just correct somebody right there and talk down to them Right Like there's none of that. You got to sit there and let them talk for you, Like you can't just talk like you want you, like there's none of that.
Speaker 3:There were him. He went with a public defender that when the other person that was helping her try to raise claims, she was like, no, we're not gonna do that. And he had good points.
Speaker 3:So it's kind of like she blew it, she, she, I don't know what but she, she kind of blew it so she was like she wasn't really trying to help. It seem like, but back to like with his sister that she, she had passed at a young age and it was due to gun violence. So that's why they would use that and say it like she. He has, um, dealings with people out here and gang violence and it's just violence, violence, violence around him and just painting that picture that he, he needs to be locked away oh wow, and so how old was and so he already has.
Speaker 2:He has one child. Yes, he has a daughter. He has a daughter. And so how old was she when this happened? Like, how old is she? He wasn't. Like how old is she? He wasn't born.
Speaker 3:He was 20 when he went to jail and I locked up for the situation. He was sentenced at 21 and she was pregnant then.
Speaker 2:So how is that for? I mean, I guess y'all married, so how is that for y'all's daughter? Do you feel like the kids I mean all the kids do you feel like they have an understanding? Do they ask y'all a lot of questions?
Speaker 3:Yes, his daughter in particular. She understands my kids. They say my youngest son, he's two. He says stuff like I don't know where he learned it at I think it's Ms Rachel she be teaching him a lot of stuff. But he says something about jail and the police. Like he was like, oh, that's the police, mama. And he was like I'm going to put you in jail. And I said, where did you get this from? Because, like we, of course, show him, like you know, super, what do you get this from? Because, like we, of course, show him, like you know, um, this is what it is. Like you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3:It's not for all bad people. Some people do bad things and they do have to go here and I make sure I explain. Like it is somewhere you don't want to be, but just because you're there. You're not a bad person always, not not saying everybody there, but you know, I just want to make sure he doesn't get that same view of people of just trying to prejudge people based off one, where they add what they look like. I don't like that. I was bullied when I was a kid, so I don't want him to grow up and be a bully or telling somebody your dad's in jail or you know like, I've seen kids, stuff like that. So I want to make sure he understands all parts of life and just you make your own interpretation of people by your introduction and your experience with them, not based off somebody else. So that's where we kind of like let him get to know him first and they met through the video first and it just eventually he loves the heck out of me. He called him dad, he, he, he prefer him over me most of the time. So it's just it's real cool to see you know a kid kids really do are like genuine people and they don't and they're so innocent so I would death.
Speaker 3:I don't play by my kids. Everybody will tell you I do not play by my kids. So if I felt like this was seriously like a situation where I was unsure of, or this may not be a great person to have my kids around or just grow up looking up to, I would not introduce them at all or have them around him. It'd just be some playful stuff. But marriage is serious. That's something that's through god. I'm a very spiritual person, I believe in god 100 and I don't play about stuff like that. So I made this commitment with my husband and god before god, and I made sure this is going to be somebody I wouldn't mind my kids mimicking, you know, I wouldn't mind if they grew up and they was just like him at all. I would hope so. Just because he has those characteristics and how he was grew up like, he values women, he understands women. So it is.
Speaker 2:I would rather that now, do you take um? Do you and the kids go and like see him? Do you take his daughter too? Do you take her to go see him?
Speaker 3:yes, I'm gonna start taking my little sister too. I haven't took took her, but just because my sister and his daughter are really close, she'll tend to want to stay there longer if she's there. But she doesn't like to be there too long. I think it's just because she is just a lot. It's overwhelming for a kid to get those spaces for too long. So I feel like with his daughter. She know wants to be able to play freely and you know you gotta right because you don't want to. You don't want her to be running around and or the kids to be running around and causing a scene and you being looked. They tell me you come out of kids and it's just too monitored. So having kids there it's not bad, but it's not somewhere you want to be for a long time with kids. You gotta change pull-ups and go to the bathroom. You know kids like to keep drinking stuff and they gotta pee every two seconds. It's hard to take kids anywhere for real.
Speaker 4:So like you sit in there, like how long do you sit yeah?
Speaker 3:I can't sit up in there too long like that. I sit there with you, but it's just. I don't like people looking at me Like I get nervous. I am shy, so I can't sit in there too long without being like, oh my gosh, they watching us.
Speaker 1:Right, we ain't got no privacy. We can't just be in a room with just us, right?
Speaker 3:They can't put us in a room. They don't have to do that. They'll put me in a room.
Speaker 4:I'm going to get the bitch took. No, this is too long.
Speaker 3:No, I didn't know. They let you rub feet up in there, they let you do a lot. Yes, that man took my shoes and my socks. I said, no, I'm nervous. I'm up in here like uh-uh. Hey, hold on, I don't know. Like who's that, I'm just scared.
Speaker 1:Like I don't, I'm scared so how long were y'all back together, or how long y'all been together and married like um since y'all got back together?
Speaker 3:we've been married since february. Yeah, we just got married this year.
Speaker 1:Well, congratulations, that's fairly recent, yeah, newlyweds how did that?
Speaker 2:how did y'all like? How did the? How did y'all work that out? How was the proposal like? Was it just a discussion? Was it surprised, like man, and you get answered that? How did that come about?
Speaker 3:yeah, how did that come about?
Speaker 4:what? What about? Like you actually married me, like I don't, like we, like I'm being her goofy, you you being me goofy? I mean, we was like we was talking, saying something, and I forgot literally how I lit up to it. But I was like you better start playing on Baby Cinema. I'm going to pay you. And she's like see ya, bro. I said I was playing, so we were talking and talking and talking and I was like you, forget about that, I'm about far away.
Speaker 1:So we were talking, and talking, and talking and I was like she's really about to hit me. I'm about to overnight, I'm talking.
Speaker 4:I mean, we talked about before we did it. We talked about the codes and we talked about the cars and it's like oh, we talked about all that that surrounds all that.
Speaker 3:Hell, yeah, we got into that restitution. I was like, hold on, I have to go pay that shit while you locked up. Hold on, we got to pay for all that shit. But that's funny, babe, because now that I think about it, when you propose to like the official proposal, it's kind of like when we started dating. You remember when we was dating and I had we was like talking and you said something. I was like we're not in a relationship and I said you didn't ask me to be your girlfriend and you was like so this whole time we've been together, I made you say will you be my girl? He was spelling it. No, you need to spell will W-I-L-L-U-Y-O-U. You know, high school we was doing too much, and I did the same thing when we was married. I was like but you never proposed to me though, so where's my proposal? Man, that man had a whole proposal in the next 30 seconds of our conversation, Like he just it be coming from the heart. So it's genuine.
Speaker 4:But I be like man your words make somebody's panties come off in two seconds. I was like she a baby man. I'm not going to waste no time. Like I know, I fucked up in the beginning on how I let things off and I always told myself I don't care who I'm with, I don't care why I'm mad at my life with them. If I ever get the opportunity, the chance to get her back and be back with her, they ass gone. I'm going to get my woman back. Fuck that. She amazing, she smart, she intelligent, she beautiful, she strong this all that. Like she is the one she been, the one she eat. And like I waste time, I'm not going to waste no time.
Speaker 3:You should have heard them, babs. Oh my God, he was shaking.
Speaker 2:And cheesing, I'm sure.
Speaker 3:He was shaking. I was like I tried to hold his hand and just reassure him. I was so nervous I don't like people watching me so I was like mine was stronger than his. Believe that it's trust. And he was like that little ass shit.
Speaker 1:No, and you know what's so crazy? Because people always, like you know, oh, when people are in jail, you know it's just jail talk, it's just this, this and that. Like you, people are in jail, you know it's just jail talk, it's just this, this and that. Like you know, they, they just telling you this because of you know their situation and this, this and that. But it's like, like you said, and I don't know if it just necessarily is a combination of everything, like being spiritual, but to know what it feels like when somebody loves you, you know what.
Speaker 1:I'm saying and that and there is no physical, there's nothing like I said before, there's nothing making this person feel like they just have to do that and it's like when you are connected, in a sense, you know the real, you know what's real. Some people do choose to, just Some people they do. Some people choose to sell people's lives and some people choose to buy it.
Speaker 2:And I know you know y'all have already made it clear that you know everybody else's opinions. Y'all worried about y'all and what y'all got going on, but when it came to being married, did y'all have a lot of support from y'all's family on either on both of y'all's sides?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I feel like we did. I feel like I haven't seen and that's that's another thing. I keep people close to me that that's going to give me supportive advice, even if you don't agree with anything that I'm doing. Support me just because I I feel like, even if you don't support me, hand it to me like, hand it to me in a supportive way to where it's like my triana.
Speaker 3:I know you're wrong. Are you gonna do whatever you want to do and I love you regardless of what you do? This is my fears with it. I would love for you to prove me wrong, but do you feel like this is this, is this, and reassure me of this? That's the way to come in. You know, telling me your fears with things or just things that you feel like can't work in a in a more positive way. It's a way that you say things don't say like well, I think that's just stupid and dumb, because ain't nobody finna be waiting. This isn't like. That's not the way to approach me with a situation. I I want people that's gonna be supportive with it, just even if they don't support, like what I'm saying. Do you get what I'm saying?
Speaker 1:like they don't have to, yeah you don't gotta support my situation, but support me and my choice, like allow me to freely make my choice and know that your love for me won't change or your respect for me won't change. Now my true honor.
Speaker 2:Miss ma'am, I am 31 years old and when I tell you you just gave me a word, like you are so mature, that handed to me lightly, I need to take that in because I'm such a blunt person and how you just explained that people have told me all the time, like you know, I come off strong, I come, but I just think that I'm just a straight shooter. So, but how you just said that, even if you don't agree, like you can hand it to me lightly, like I, I took some from that. Thank you, that's something.
Speaker 2:I definitely need to work on.
Speaker 3:I told you People tell me that all the time he be trying to get me to talk to people in there. He'll put people on the phone like, yeah, babe he going through something. I'm like, wait, wait, I'm sitting here waiting. Of course I'm a positive person. I've learned a lot of ways that I was. I was approaching people or just communicating with them. It wasn't a if. I'm wanting a result from you. I don't want to attack you. Understand where I'm coming from and I care and I love you.
Speaker 3:But my friends, I get emotionally attached to their situation. So I have situations where I'm probably is tired of hearing the same thing, but at no point ever have to worry about me not answering the phone for you because I don't want to hear me not giving you supportive advice. I don't ever tell my friends leave that man alone, leave him, stop talking to him. That you don't want to hear that like. I want to always be your avenue and be somebody that you feel like you have through this rough time. Although I may not agree, I don't want to make your decisions for you because if I tell you to leave that man and he taking care of them kids which even though he he'd not shit to you. I can't fulfill his spot. I'm telling you to leave him, but how am I going to help you get to to where you was at while you was with him? I don't want to be responsible for a downfall If it comes from a decision you made based off my opinion Correct, and that was me, but I love you.
Speaker 1:That was me, that was me all day. And I think that as I grew and I mature and I listened to her and, like her, my friends out say well, you know, you seem like this or you seem like this, or you seem like you're judging, judging me, or you want me to do this and do that. But, like you said, it's just you love. When you love somebody and you love hard, you like you want to protect them, you want them to be like, you want them to have everything they deserve and it's like oh, I see that this ain't what you deserve, but who am I to say that, when your journey is supposed to stop with this situation or whatever, like I have to allow you to ride this journey out, or whatever it is that the lord is trying to reveal to you in this situation, whatever lesson, I can't come in between that, because then you're gonna resent me later and I don't want that I wish we could have had this conversation yesterday.
Speaker 2:Y'all, because everything we're talking about god is using. Y'all, because I just told somebody to leave that man yesterday and I had no business.
Speaker 3:I had no business, my god trying to take you, no, but that's okay, you, sometimes we just use our heart first, and that's okay.
Speaker 3:Oh god, don't charge my heart, you know you know I I don't, I don't know, I just I be trying to navigate. I I pray a lot, I try to like, then, as they say, but I don't know, I like, I just like to come to like, I don't know, manage or balance my energy because I don't like to be upset. I don't like to upset other people. People feel like I'm a people pleaser because I don't want to make nobody mad. I don't like to be disrespectful. I've learned if somebody says stuff to me, if you send them comments, I try not to say bad things back. Somebody. Somebody says I'm by my mama, though they say she's like a street walker. I had to go there because her mom was like ain't, no way you say my mom, I just had I had no beautiful and she looks so young like nothing about her gay streetwalker nothing, but it was the pimp suit, it was the um, the fur.
Speaker 3:Yes, why did you go up here like this? What I'm saying, you know it never gave streetwalker, though I had to go to her mama pictures and I, just I went there. But most people I don't do that because I know God got a funny way to put stuff back on you and making you feel the words you made somebody else feel, so and.
Speaker 2:I did want to just go back to like I know, montreana, you said you had a lot of support from your family. Manny, did you had a lot of support from your family, manny? Did you have a lot of support from your family, too, when it came to the whole?
Speaker 4:Proposing and getting married. My auntie, cousin, all them, my ex-boyfriend straight up. I'm like, man, I got, like I ain't say it's out there, like y'all support me in my situation, like I need you to marry while I'm locked up, my auntie, I'm like, yeah, we support you like we never. Like ain't nobody in our family married, so by me being married, me being who I am, they're like you as you sure you want to get married, you sure you don't get married, I, you don't want to wait, you come home. I told they at hell, no, I ain't gonna wait till I come home. Like, no, I want to get married right now. I feel it, I want it, I'm touching it, I want it, I need it.
Speaker 3:Like that thing. We was waiting till you get home. It's like we doing this now for us and god, like we're gonna be if I'm not doing no wifey stuff without being a wife. Hey, there's a lot of women that's that's being a girlfriend and they going out of their way and doing all this and doing all that. We've had that conversation like the only way we can ensure it and I know that you're serious and we're seeing, because I never made him stop talking to nobody.
Speaker 3:Initially I thought we were just gonna be like you know, talking, we're gonna work our way back into a relationship eventually, but we, off the bat, we just was like and that's what I appreciate about you, babe, that you told them women like I never told him that, but you know how we always want the man to make that move, like I shouldn't have to tell somebody, I shouldn't have to tell you he did it. I never said nothing about the other women, I never really knew about them. Like that. He just was like, babe, I did this, I did this and but he let them know it's a lot of men that have just dropped people and they won't give them an explanation or they won't like give them that closure and he was right.
Speaker 3:And another thing he because he was saying like they know who I am, he's never been a cheater. In no relationship has he ever cheated on anybody, even his ex. We had a conversation and she even said that like she gave him his problem. He's not a cheater, he don't do that. So that that was in a fear of mine too, because they'll say how do you know he's not talking to other women. I don't have that fear. I don't fear him being dishonest because he tells me stuff. So it's like I don't feel like I need to have that part of with him yeah, that's important, that communication and that trust.
Speaker 1:That's very important my father's family.
Speaker 4:I feel like I do got this support. I feel like I do like this support, that's good.
Speaker 1:That's good. That's always important. You know to have that support and other people because, like you said, at the end of the day there's always going to be the negative, there's always going to be the haters, there's always going to be those people that try to bring you down because they're not happy. So when you got those people genuinely rooting for you, you like that don't really matter to me. Like these people know me, they know what I stand for, they understand this union. Like I ain't worried about that Exactly. But, like being married to somebody, of course you need family support, friend support, like other family support as well.
Speaker 4:So like that kind of situation like this, you need support for real, for real. So like that's a situation like this, you need support for real, for real. Shit do get hard, shit do get overbearing and stressful. But I mean I can't let my anger take control while I'm doing this time, because that's going to be hard on me, it's going to stress me out. My son she's big on energy and she pick up my energy as soon as I say hello, hey, what's up. What's up, what's up? Oh wow, I ain't even going to go into a conversation. What's wrong? Like she pick me up on that energy. She's dope. Like I can't be mad at her and let too much of this energy and anger that's other things going on Pursue me and stress me out when I got other big problems going on.
Speaker 3:So if that don't stress me out, why would I let other shit stress me out? That's kind of what led us to well, to me to responding to when you all had reached out and stuff. Because I'm like, like I said, I'm big on energy and like I have to read something a couple times before I respond, or just fill it out or pray on it, and I ask God like, is this for this for me? You know, like I have to, because some people don't have the best intentions.
Speaker 3:You know, or some people will like reach out to us and they they're more more worried about making it like a a controversial topic to have other people attack us.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean and I did not feel that at all, so it would it made it easier to like communicate and move forward, basically yes I'm like literally fighting back tears because I that you guys are the second guest that we've had that, have said that and we have been digging into a lot of like deeper topics and, like I said in the beginning of the podcast, that's always been been the intention. Like for me, I felt called by God to create this platform to be able to, um, you know, have these conversations and, like I said, learn how other people are living their lives and like what works for other people and like just being of some support. Like, at the end of the day, I know that, regardless, I'm not, you know, the picture perfect person and I love to be able to share my testimony and I love to be able to, for other people to share their testimony with me. And so for a guest to come on and say, no, not only did I listen to your podcast and you have good content, or this is an ad, or I feel like you're, you're doing this, it's like they felt led spiritually and that's what I want.
Speaker 1:I don't want no one to come on to the podcast because we have a million views, or we are doing this, or we're interviewing this person or that person. We want people to feel, you know, called to be and sit with us and conversate with us, because really that's what the goal is. Right, he said where y'all located. I agree with that 100%. I definitely feel led, because really that's what the goal is.
Speaker 3:Right. He said where y'all located. I agree with that 100%.
Speaker 1:I definitely thank you so much. We're in Columbus Ohio.
Speaker 4:I like y'all they're trying to make us cry and.
Speaker 2:I can't we emotional it's not the right weekend it's just a lot of emotions.
Speaker 4:Y'all made me drop the phone.
Speaker 1:I ain't gonna put some more money on this we thank you so much, manny, for talking with us. We didn't, like we said, we didn't expect that. We would have never even asked for that. We appreciate you.
Speaker 4:Is our business going to end right now?
Speaker 2:Yeah, he said we missed it, we got to hang up right now. No, nope, we don't have to hang up right now. Did the phone hang up?
Speaker 3:No, he's about to hang up, he was just playing.
Speaker 2:I want to play more about, like I know, montreal you said you're like uh, did you say you're an entrepreneur?
Speaker 3:well, yes, I got. I'm about to start this clothing situation here soon and break. Yeah, I sell hair as well yes, I seen your picture.
Speaker 1:I'm like her hair is slayed. So do you do hair or you just sell it?
Speaker 3:I just sell it.
Speaker 1:Oh so you got a good girl down there that's slaying your hair yes, I have a couple different hair stylists but, I typically go to Chicago Back home to get my hair done.
Speaker 2:Okay, because I was going to say when you said you were in Iowa. I didn't know, I didn't know there was a lot of Black people in Iowa. I'm going to just be honest with you.
Speaker 3:Yes, my stylist Shamel. She's In Iowa and she be doing my Wow. That's who did my hair in the um the yeah, don't judge. Okay, she all right.
Speaker 1:Nope, yeah, my sister was just in iowa last weekend with her friends and that's why I said I said where you at um? And she said iowa. And I said where, because I never heard nobody like going down that Iowa kick.
Speaker 2:She said she had a good time like I would think that would be such a culture shock to go from.
Speaker 1:You said you're from, but Iowa is what?
Speaker 3:an hour away from Chicago it's about two and a half, so it's about three, but it's not where I'm at. In Iowa they have horrible food. I have no good. Yes, they only got a couple good places out here. It's so gross I hate it. It's affordable, but the food is gross.
Speaker 1:What? How long have you been in Iowa? Since 2019.
Speaker 2:Okay, and you moving there, was it something Go ahead?
Speaker 3:No 2009. Okay.
Speaker 2:And you moving there? Did it have something to do with, like, being closer to manny or something, or did you already know about something that I would like? What made you pick, choose to?
Speaker 3:move here. My mom found a three-bedroom house. It was five hundred dollars. Oh, yeah, you said iowa. Okay, yeah, that was 2009, but yeah, he moved um because of that. That was really it.
Speaker 3:My aunt had lived here and she she said it was affordable and it was safer because we're in chicago and she got a son and it was just much going on. She wanted a different environment and experience. So she moved us to iowa. And it was so crazy because it's like I feel like that man was made for me, so it was like I was supposed to come. Not, I was supposed to come down before I was supposed to go to that school. Everything was supposed to happen.
Speaker 3:I used to pray when we had broken up, because I've always been very close to God. I used to pray all the time we broke up, like if it's meant to be, it'll come back to me. And it's so crazy because I always tell him that and I thank god and I'm like you always come through. Even I was telling him if it's not for me, okay, I wasn't gonna accept that. I know you got something better, but I ran into several relationships and I feel like he was building both of us up for each other because I needed to go through the things that I went through.
Speaker 3:So I had to talk to a man and, just like a masculine man that's soft with me, I've always been the the hard person and the one that's often like I'm checking the nigga. But I dealt with him and I had to learn. I had to learn to just pipe down and allow the man to be a man. But I'm only gonna allow you to be a man if you you get me in that soft girl area. You you got to treat me right. So I've learned. But yes, I feel like he did that for a reason we weren't supposed to be together in high school.
Speaker 1:We needed to go through that Absolutely, and I think that you are so wise, I think that at your young age you are teaching a lot of people things like you know what I'm saying and just different perspective is so it's so deep and I it just makes me think back because I feel like I wasn't quite as young as you but I had somebody that I had a friendship with since I was a child, like 12 years old and it was.
Speaker 1:You know we was calling ourselves, you know, boyfriend, girlfriend at a young age. You know what I'm saying. But it was just this. It was like it was deeper than that. It was like a friendship and we always, no matter how long we would go without speaking, we would always reconnect and catch up and it'll be like no time had passed.
Speaker 1:And when we reconnect, the last time he was in prison doing a bid and you know, like you said, you know we connected and after so, after so many months of talking and you know, the conversation came up if we wanted to pursue a relationship now as adults, even with him being in his situation, and in my mind I thought I could do it. You know what I'm saying. I thought I could do it. I, you know, I was used to living my life a certain way. I had only been with my child's father for so long and so I'm like, okay, yeah, like I know that the love is there, the connection is there. Why not? It's going to be easy, you know, and you know, after some time passed, it just got harder for me and I felt like, in that sense, I felt him and I feel like I understand where I went wrong about not being honest, like, okay, this isn't really working for me too much, like I thought it would be easier. But I am a very, like, emotional person and I'll be.
Speaker 1:I was going through a lot of the time and I'm like I feel like I physically need someone here, but really what I should have been leaning on is like at that time, is leaning on the Lord, praying about it, and I didn't do that and I feel like that tarnished our friendship and and it, it, it's messed up because I can understand where he's coming from. Like I'm in the worst spot in my life right now. I feel like everybody turning back on me and he just didn't expect that from me.
Speaker 1:So even like you being so young and being able to say, look, I trust the God every way, from the beginning to the end, like I pray, I spoke with God about it, like I can respect that and I love that, I love there's nothing more. I love to hear a young woman, a young man say is like I was calling on the Lord because here I am, I was getting advice from other people and they like telling me what people telling you they're like girl, what you this, you that you got this going for yourself.
Speaker 1:You don't need that you know, I don't know, I was probably supportive because I feel, like you were supportive because of the person, because you knew him and you knew our situation.
Speaker 2:But I feel like you was kind of like because you really think you're gonna, you know, I feel like that's how you was coming right, because even from you know, hearing y'all's situation of matriana, like even this, is making me, and that's why it's so great to have these conversations, because it's a this hearing y'all's perspective and everything. It's really, you know, changes, some thoughts and things that I would have. You know what I mean, because I don't know if I was in your situation, just to be blunt and put it out there, I don't know how I could have handled that. You know what.
Speaker 2:I mean but to even hear y'all on the phone, you can hear y'all's love like you can hear y'all's connection like it's. It's really I'm very, it's contagious yes yes, y'all smiling g with me and kind of like because you know it's, it's one-sided to people.
Speaker 3:So I feel like a lot of people's perspectives would be different if they heard him speak, because now it just looks like, oh, this girl the lulu, and he's feeding her stuff and you never, they don't hear him and how he communicates and just how he talks and his maturity and just how he he averages, like he's the other little side of me, so that's, that's another thing.
Speaker 4:But when they, when they be like, oh, she just moves on, she naive, she dumb, yada, yada, yada for being about her by his side while he locked up and did that in the third and I go back to what you're saying it's like what makes you happy, who makes you happy? What level makes you happy? But in all actuality, everybody in this world is dumb and delusional for the motherfucker that they with in a way. You better say it so. So that's something that, like that told me for a little bit. It's like how can you talk down on somebody in that situation? You messing with dude and he all messing with your cousin, your sister, your auntie, your friend and you at home waiting on him to come back home, and you just don't know the situations, calling you or whatever the situation may be.
Speaker 3:You just don't know the situations. And people definitely project and they put a lot of stuff off on us that they've done to other people or they have experience in their relationships and expect me to just be like okay, I'm going to make a decision and you're not married. You try to tell me you done had 16 boyfriends and baby daddies Well, not boyfriends, but baby daddies and you got me. You didn't have 16 boyfriends and baby daddy well, not boyfriends, but baby daddies and you got 27 kids. And I'll post a list to you about telling me that he me. You gotta right, I'm not about to do that. No, and this felt like that I love.
Speaker 3:I've talked to a lot of married couples. I talked to a lot of just couples. I've talked to a lot of people that have been married for years and the first thing they say is communication. And the second thing they say is do not argue over little things and fight hard, because it is okay to have disagreements, but they always say like if y'all could get past it and you could get over it in that next second, don't make it a big deal. You never know when it's going to be your last day with your spouse. Take advantage of having that time. I talk to older people on the phone all the time, and that's the first. That's what they say all the time and I love that.
Speaker 1:So I'm giving advice to them For sure, and, like he said, being delusional for love because if you want to take it back to the biblical days, you know what I'm saying even adam was delusional. I mean, he ate that apple after god told him don't eat, but because his wife told him, the serpent told me, that this apple will bless us, it will give us all the things that god don't want us to have. He ate that of that apple and tried to be like, but she said no, yeah, she told you and you went for it because you was the little one for that love you know.
Speaker 3:But now we all gotta suffer from that. We all gotta have pain for period. Listen, why not?
Speaker 1:listen, you know, but it all ends up being worth it because, like you said, that's true love you. You don't come by that. You don't come by that too often, especially like I say, and nowadays everybody's fixated with the money and getting a bag or what he buying you, and this is that nobody wants.
Speaker 1:Social media yeah, nobody wants to emotionally really tap in, for whatever reason, maybe a fear of being heartbroken or hurt, or fear of being vulnerable or whatever. And but at the end of the day, what is life without love? You know, real, genuine, true love y'all are dope, y'all are dope. I'm so happy we did this.
Speaker 2:We're gonna have to do a uh, we're gonna have to get later on too and get some um, what do you call it?
Speaker 1:uh, follow up follow up um yeah that was amazing yeah, we.
Speaker 1:So we thank you guys again so much for taking the time out to speak with us. I know that this is the time y'all usually get to speak and I'm you know, that the Lord was able to deliver that energy between us. You know too, because I reach out to you, know people all the time and I do that to the people that I feel called. So it's it's. It goes both ways. If I I see a lot of topics, a lot of stuff, like I said, that people talking about that, I feel like, ooh, this would be a good or this would get a lot of attention. But for me that's not. Like I said, that's not my priority.
Speaker 1:I don't want to just do things, just to do it. I'm here to serve a purpose and I ain't trying to do nothing that ain't you know, because I'm not trying to miss my mark. So I definitely. Anything that I feel you know, anybody that I've reached out to, is because I felt led to as well, and the fact that is reciprocated and that it was able to come to fruition.
Speaker 3:I will always appreciate you guys for that yes, and when you get out, we definitely be interested in the part two period, period.
Speaker 1:We we here for we rooting for y'all definitely I followed you, so I will definitely be, you know, keeping up, you know from a distance and yeah do you want to share?
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, I didn't want to interrupt, but did you want to share your instagram for anybody else that's listening that might want to follow, do you?
Speaker 3:um, my instagram is at ibtree tree, so I b? E t-R-E. His is on there too. I think it's like Moneybag, you gonna. I tag him all the time, you gonna feel, you gonna feel. But that's my TikTok too, and my Facebook is Montreana Cobra.
Speaker 2:Okay, yep, I found him, you right. You sure do tag him. He got some long hair. Yep, it's Moneybag2x.
Speaker 3:Yep, jeff is money bag two times two X, yep, see, yep, that is exactly it.
Speaker 2:Yep I just followed you.
Speaker 1:Thank you, yes y'all Tap in with Montriana. She got her clothing line coming through she got her hair, that hair look good.
Speaker 3:I'm about to get on in with that that curly hair.
Speaker 1:I was loving that so. I'm about to order me some, for sure, yes, I appreciate it.
Speaker 4:Thank y'all.
Speaker 2:Thank y'all, no problem, I'm praying for y'all and y'all's babies and y'all's situation and y'all definitely y'all got y'all supporters over here. I'm definitely supporting and encouraging y'all no-transcript.